In the times of the Buddha, there lived a terrifying man named Angulimala. He was a serial killer who had committed numerous atrocities, and wore a gruesome necklace made of the fingers of his victims. One day, he spotted the Buddha walking calmly and peacefully in his path. This was an unusual sight for Angulimala, for everyone else would run in fear upon seeing him. He felt an urge to dominate this composed figure who showed no fear, so he shouted, "Stop!"
To his surprise, the Buddha turned to him and replied, "I stopped long ago, Angulimala. It is you who have not stopped." This interaction made Angulimala reflect on what it was he was doing with his life. He experienced deep regret and a strong desire to stop engaging in harmful actions. According to Buddhist tradition, Angulimala went on to become a monk and changed his life.
This profound story speaks volumes about the inner dynamics of our emotions and desires. Like Angulimala, we are often in a state of continuous motion, driven by our emotions, chasing after things we desire or running away from things we fear. Our actions are dictated by a constant flux of emotions, causing us to become reactionary, much like how Angulimala was always running – either towards potential victims or away from those who sought justice.
However, the Buddha's words reveal an alternative way to engage with our lives. His statement, "I stopped long ago," refers to a cessation of this relentless running. He is not controlled by unchecked desires or fears, but is rather in a state of peace, where he engages with life as it comes, calmly and mindfully.
Relating this story to our 'Kitchen of the Mind' metaphor, our desires and fears are also guests at our table. If we are always running after desirable emotions or running away from uncomfortable ones, we're at the mercy of our emotions, much like Angulimala.
On the other hand, when we 'stop' as the Buddha did, we change our relationship with our emotions. Stopping doesn't mean we suppress or ignore our emotions. Rather, we learn to observe them, understand them, and respond to them mindfully instead of reactively. By 'stopping,' we create space for emotional intelligence to flourish.
Just as the Buddha engaged with Angulimala, we can engage with our emotions in a non-reactive and understanding way. We can invite even the most intimidating emotions – our Angulimalas – to our table, to understand their origins and what they're trying to tell us.
This transformative approach to dealing with our emotions helps us find peace within ourselves, even amidst the rollercoaster of emotions that life throws our way. By cultivating this kind of emotional intelligence, we embody the Buddha's act of 'stopping' – we gain the freedom to engage with life in a more skillful, conscious, and compassionate way.
The story of Angulimala not only teaches us how to manage our emotions but also provides insights into understanding our wants and desires, how they control our lives, and how we can achieve a sense of peace by 'stopping.'
What do you want? What do you NOT not want?
Much like our emotions, our wants can also become our masters if we let them. These wants may be for tangible things like material possessions, or they could be intangible, such as status, validation, or power. The story of Angulimala portrays how his uncontrolled desires pushed him towards a path of brutality and fear.
Whatever it was that Angulimala was chasing after, he was caught in a continuous cycle of violence. It was only when he encountered the Buddha, who had 'stopped,' that Angulimala realized there was another way to live. This represents a pivotal moment of realization and change, where Angulimala recognized that his wants had been driving his harmful actions, and he made the conscious decision to stop.
Furthermore, the concept of 'stopping,' as the Buddha explained it, also ties back to the story of "The Other Side." The Buddha was already on the 'other side,' at peace with himself and his emotions. He wasn't chasing after desires or running from fears. This acceptance and peace with the present moment and with one's current emotional state align with the lessons from "The Other Side" - that we're already where we need to be.
In this sense, both Angulimala and the traveler from the 'other side' story were caught in a state of continuous wanting and seeking. But as both stories illustrate, the peace we seek is not somewhere else or in some future state, it's available in the present moment when we 'stop,' accept, and understand our emotions and wants.
In conclusion, by understanding the relationship between our emotions and wants and by learning how to manage them, we can navigate life with more emotional intelligence and inner peace. The act of 'stopping' to engage with our emotions and wants mindfully, as depicted in the story of Angulimala, leads to a deeper understanding of ourselves, which can transform the way we live our lives.
Key Takeaways
Understanding Emotions and Desires: It's important to understand our emotions and desires, and how they drive our actions. Angulimala was driven by his unchecked desires and fears, leading him to a path of violence. It's only when we understand these emotions and desires can we begin to control them, instead of letting them control us.
The Power of Stopping: The Buddha's act of 'stopping' symbolizes a cessation of being controlled by unchecked desires and fears. Instead of constantly chasing after or running away from our emotions, we can choose to stop, observe, and understand them. This doesn't mean suppressing our emotions, but rather engaging with them in a mindful and non-reactive way.
Emotional Intelligence: By stopping and engaging with our emotions, we create space for emotional intelligence to flourish. This involves understanding our emotions, responding to them mindfully, and using this understanding to guide our thinking and behavior. This can lead to a more skillful, conscious, and compassionate way of living.
The Role of Wants: Our wants, whether tangible or intangible, can control our lives if we let them. By understanding and managing our wants, we can prevent them from leading us down a harmful path, much like Angulimala.
Peace in the Present Moment: The story teaches us that the peace we seek is not in some future state or somewhere else, but available in the present moment. By stopping and accepting our current emotional state, we can find peace within ourselves.
Transformation and Change: The story also emphasizes the possibility of transformation and change. Angulimala, despite his past atrocities, was able to change his life around. This teaches us that it's never too late to change our ways and start fresh.