The River, Raft, and Monks
There are three compelling stories that revolve around the concept of crossing a river. Each of these stories holds distinct meanings, yet all of them bear significant implications for our lives and our pursuit of inner peace.
You are on the other side
In a small village, a traveler arrived at the bank of a wide river. Looking across the water, the traveler spotted a monk walking peacefully on the other side. Intrigued by the sight, the traveler shouted across the river, "How do I get to the other side?" The monk, momentarily shaken from his walking meditation and looking somewhat puzzled, yelled back, "But you are on the other side!"
This simple Zen story conveys a deep truth about our emotional experiences. We often find ourselves in a constant state of wanting to be somewhere else, to be experiencing some other emotion rather than what we're feeling in the moment. We're always trying to cross some proverbial river to reach the 'other side' – a place where we believe we'll be happier, more content, or more at peace.
However, just as the monk points out to the traveler, we are already on the 'other side.' In terms of our emotional journey, this means that every emotion we experience – be it joy, sadness, anger, or anything else – is a part of our human experience. These emotions are not obstacles we need to cross to reach some other side, they are the 'other side.' We are already where we need to be to learn, grow, and experience life fully.
Wherever you go, your emotional state goes with you and influences your experiences.
When we resist our current emotional state and long to be somewhere else, we're like the traveler yelling across the river. We're failing to recognize that where we are and what we're feeling is already a part of the journey.
By bringing awareness, acceptance, and emotional regulation into our lives – much like we discussed earlier with the 'Kitchen of the Mind' metaphor – we can start to understand and embrace our emotions. Each emotion that comes to our table, each 'horse' we learn to ride, is a part of our journey, not a barrier to it.
When we understand our emotions, when we listen to them and engage with them rather than trying to push them away, or replace them with new ones, we can find that we are already on the other side. We start to realize that every emotional state is an opportunity for growth and insight, and that there is no river we need to cross. The monk, the traveler, and the river all serve to remind us to embrace our emotions as they are, because in every moment, we are already on the 'other side.'
Remember, the goal isn't to reach the 'other side.' The goal is to understand that we are always on the 'other side.' Our experiences, our emotions, and our growth - these are the journey, and we are already where we need to be to engage with them fully. This isn't about complacency or refusing growth, but rather about understanding that growth and learning are ongoing processes, and we're right in the midst of it, right here, right now.
The Parable of the Raft
There is a simple yet profound parable shared in Buddhism that demonstrates the utility of teachings and practices. It's known as the Parable of the Raft.
In this story, imagine you're standing at the edge of a vast river with the goal of reaching the shore on the other side. You construct a raft from nearby materials and, using it, you successfully navigate the waters and reach the other side. Once you've reached your destination, the question arises: "Do you carry the raft with you on land, or do you leave it behind?"
The Buddha likened his teachings to this very raft. They serve as a tool to navigate the turbulent waters of life, the existential challenges, and the inner turmoil we encounter. But once you've crossed these metaphorical waters and reached a state of understanding, wisdom, and inner peace, the raft—the teachings and practices—can be set aside.The goal isn't to become attached to the teachings, or the raft, but to use them as a means to an end—the attainment of inner peace.
Just as the parable of the raft offers insight into the utility of teachings and practices, it also provides a powerful metaphor for reflecting on our past. Our past experiences, beliefs, and thoughts can be seen as rafts that have helped us cross certain rivers in our lives. They've formed a crucial part of our journey, offering us lessons, shelter, or direction in challenging currents.
However, once we've crossed these rivers, it's important to acknowledge that some aspects of our past may no longer serve us in our present or future journey. Holding onto outdated beliefs, dwelling on past experiences, or being governed by old thought patterns is akin to carrying the raft on dry land. It can become burdensome and hinder our progress towards inner peace.
The past, just like the raft, has served its purpose. It has brought you to where you are now but doesn't necessarily define where you're going. Recognizing this allows us to express gratitude for these experiences while understanding that it’s ok to let go.
In your pursuit of inner peace, it's helpful to remember that it's perfectly fine to leave your "raft" behind. This act of letting go doesn't erase or diminish your past. It simply acknowledges that you've grown from it and that you're ready to move forward unencumbered. This way, you can tread lightly and freely toward your goal of cultivating inner peace.
The Monks Crossing the River
In ancient times, two monks journeyed across the land, a senior monk and his younger counterpart. As they approached a river, they found a young woman unable to cross. Without a word, the senior monk lifted her onto his shoulders and carried her across. Once they reached the other side, he put her down, and they continued their journey.
Hours passed in silence, the junior monk wrestling with his thoughts. Finally, he couldn't contain himself. "Why did you carry her across the river?" he asked, troubled. "We are monks, we aren't supposed to touch women."
The senior monk simply looked at him and said, "I put the girl down after crossing the river. Why do you still carry her?"
This tale, like the parable of the raft, emphasizes how often we continue to carry things, mental or emotional burdens, well past their time of necessity. The junior monk carried his discontent and confusion long after the senior monk had put the girl down. Similarly, we might carry the weight of our past, like the raft or like the girl, preventing us from reaching a state of inner peace.
Another layer in this parable reminds us that sometimes, we find ourselves doing things we never imagined we would, as circumstances require flexibility and wisdom. Like the senior monk, who went against convention by carrying the girl, we might also need to go against our own beliefs or conventions for the greater good or the wiser choice.
The pursuit of inner peace involves recognizing when it's time to let go of things we no longer need to carry. Just as the senior monk let go of the girl once they crossed the river, we must learn to let go of past experiences, outdated beliefs, and old thought patterns that no longer serve us.
By understanding these lessons, we can prevent our inner peace from being disrupted by the weight of unnecessary burdens. Instead, we can focus on being present, flexible, and wise, adapting to circumstances and making decisions that align with our pursuit of inner peace.
Key Takeaways
Living in the Present: The Zen story of the traveler and the monk teaches us to be present and embrace our emotions, as they are part of our journey and not obstacles to cross. We often strive to be somewhere else emotionally, neglecting the fact that our current emotions are crucial parts of our human experience.
Awareness and Acceptance: Bringing awareness, acceptance, and emotional regulation into our lives allows us to understand and embrace our emotions rather than pushing them away or seeking to replace them.
Continual Growth and Learning: It's important to recognize that learning and development are continuous processes. We are always on the 'other side,' experiencing and growing from our experiences, and we don't need to be anywhere else to engage fully with life.
Useful Tools, Not Burdens: The Parable of the Raft teaches us that teachings, beliefs, or experiences are like rafts that help us navigate life's challenges. Once these tools have served their purpose, they can be set aside. Holding onto them can hinder our journey toward inner peace.
Letting Go of the Past: The same parable underscores that our past, like the raft, has served its purpose. Recognizing this allows us to express gratitude for these experiences while understanding that it's okay to let go.
Flexibility and Wisdom: The tale of the Monks Crossing the River emphasizes the importance of letting go of unnecessary burdens and demonstrates that sometimes we need to act against our own beliefs or conventions for the wiser choice. This is part of maintaining inner peace and being able to adapt to changing circumstances.
Understanding Our Emotional Burdens: All the stories underline the importance of recognizing when we're carrying emotional or mental burdens that no longer serve us and the need to let them go to cultivate inner peace.